"Someday when you are a mother..."

The evening before my 17th birthday, according to my diary "Mom and I had a fight and she left. Later we made up and are friends. Mom wrote me a letter and I wrote her one."

I ran across the letter she wrote that night. I can't believe that I've saved it all these years - 39 years to be exact and almost to the day. It's really amazing that I read this letter at this time. It goes along so well with an adult Sunday school lesson I taught in the last week. The lesson was about how parents try to advise and guide their children of what not to do since the parents may have already done the same things. Parents want to save their children from making mistakes. My mother wanted to save me from heartache and making mistakes, but as a 16 year old - soon to be a 17 year old, I didn't want to hear it. Sound familiar to any of you?

Anyway, here is my mom's love letter to me dated Sunday night, July 27, 1969 while living in Valdosta...

"Dearest Carol,

As I sit here to write you a few of the things that are in my heart, first of all let me say "I do love you very much", in fact more than you will ever understand until you have a daughter of your own someday.

On this the eve of your 17th birthday, I'm thankful to my Heavenly Father that he has blessed me with a wonderful daughter like you. Because you are sweet and beautiful in my eyes.

Carol, please forgive me for being rough on you, but you are my first-born and a part of me. I'll always be more harsh with you than the others not because I love you more or less, but because you are the first one. It's awfully hard on me having you grow up. You see I still want to make all of your decisions (but this is wrong of me). You have to start making your own decisions as this is a part of growing up. I want to keep you always safe with me. Since I know of the many pitfalls that can happen to you, I don't want anyone to hurt you. But then I hurt you myself. Let me say I think it is harder on mothers to see their children grow up than it is on fathers. This too you will understand some day.

Carol, I do want you to have fun and enjoy life, but the more things you do, the farther away from me you get. This makes me sad. But I know I must cut loose the apron strings some so please have patience with me and I promise to try hard.

For there is nothing I want more for you than a happy home of your own someday with the priesthood within and Heavenly Father to be your dictator.

Just always remember I do love you even when I'm unhappy and fuss at you.

Someday when you are a mother, then you will understand all things better.

May Heavenly Father continue to bless you is my prayer. Have faith and patience and the right boy will come along for you.

Happy Birthday!!

Love ya,

Mother "
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Was Mom right? Would I one day understand when I had a daughter? Well, yes and no. I never had a daughter, but I did understand what my mom was trying to say. You do want to make decisions for your child since as a parent you do know better, you do want to protect and keep your children safe. Corey was my first born - my only child, my only chance to be a mother, my "heir with no spare" and I didn't want anything bad to ever hurt him. Did I save him from the pain of life's experiences? No, but somewhere along the way with the help of many, many people, he turned out to be a fantastic person!