You Just Never Know Until...

In a few hours it will be my birthday.  My 59th birthday.  I don't expect much from it mainly because I don't need or want anything.  I have all that I need and want really.  Oh, don't let me kid you - I'd love more money to do the things I'd like to do such as travel, hire a private trainer, someone to cook and clean for me - things like that.  But, in the real world, I have all that I want or need.

I've gone to the mailbox this week and every day has brought some new surprise there or the patio chair parked beside the front door has produced handmade goodies several times recently. 

I got an unexpected card the other day.  It read on the inside, "So glad to have a friend like you!  Happy Birthday".  And then written it said "You probably have no idea how much I admire you.  You are an incredible woman of strength and courage."

I don't know this woman very well other than she and her husband served a mission together, she is very sweet and so knowledgeable about the gospel and so nicely soft-spoken.  In other words, she is so totally the opposite of myself.  But, her words make me feel so wonderful in that she apparently sees in me what I feel I lack so many times.

Then another card arrived in today's mail.  Inside it read, "Thank you for all the kindnesses you showed me when you were my visiting teacher.  They helped me at a hard spot in my life.  Have a great birthday.  You are a super special lady.  I love your great sense of humor.  You are a fun person and great example of a follower of Christ."

Wow, once again the power of visiting teaching has shown me how much we can influence people even if we don't think we are.  I had no idea that this sweet woman felt this way about me, but I am so happy that apparently I have made a difference in her life.



And then finally tonight when I came home after working for almost 12 hours, there on my living room floor was a beautiful bag with presents and a handwritten card for me.  It read, "Dear Carol, Happy Birthday!!!  I just wanted to send my love and remind you how wonderful you are!  It has been such a blessing for us to know you and Joe.  A tender mercy...

Here's a little something for you to remind you 1st, of what an angel you are, and 2nd - that you always have angels watching out for you!  I just loved a part of this talk that reminded me of you because it was about angels.
I hope sometime when you ever get a moment or just need a pick-me up, you will read from this and be lifted. 
"God never leaves us alone," he says.  I know that's true.  Thanks for being the first person to reach out, love and be our angel this summer!  We love you guys!

The gift bag contained two angels and a beautiful talk by Jeffrey R. Holland about "The Ministry of Angels".  These gifts and the handwritten card are from a young couple who are here for only three months while the husband does some internship with the federal government.  I introduced myself to them their first Sunday, had them over for dinner and we've gone on daycation together, out to dinner and special lectures and I was made her visiting teacher. 
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I just know it's easy to reach out and love people - especially in our ward.  That's what they did for us when we first moved here and they've never stopped doing it since.  Our ward is filled with angels in all shapes and sizes.  So, many thanks to all the unknown angels from the Weaver family.  Thanks for the anonymous goodies, the priesthood blessings, the phone calls, the cards, the visits, the tears of comfort and joy, the wonderful home teachers, the fantastic visiting teachers and all the other countless and unnamed peoples, in and out of our ward family that have been blessings in my life, in Joe's life.

Life is good.  Life is great, most of the time.  Life and love is a present that I enjoy having every single day - not just on my birthday.

Personal Blessings From Paying An Honest Tithing

When I was laid off, one of the things that Joe and I decided was that no matter what, we would pay a full tithing. Our reasoning was how could we expect the Lord to look after us monetarily if we couldn't pay him just 10% of what we got. After all, the Lord himself said "Prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of Hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it"(Mal. 3:10). What would be the harm in putting the Lord to the test and see if he would deliver?

President Gordon B. Hinckley said, "We can pay our tithing. It is not so much a matter of money as it is a matter of faith. I have yet to find a faithful tithe payer who cannot testify that in a very literal and wonderful way the windows of heaven have been opened and blessings have been poured out upon him or her".

I can truly testify that this is all true as we have had it shown in our own personal life in so many ways over the past few months. I have been calling them "many, mini miracles" and I know it has been because of paying a full tithing.

- Joe has not had any medical emergencies since the first part of January;

- Because I was laid off, we were able to be approved for special financial circumstances from the hospital and I've been able to pay off all of Joe's medical expenses;

- Joe has been referred for evaluation to be placed on the national kidney transplant list;

- I've gone in to purchase medications for Joe and been told there was no charge;

- We received a letter in the mail recently stating that all of his medications are either $2.50 or $6.30 only;

- Joe's monthly disability check has been increased almost $100 per month;

- I had someone call me wanting me to work as a temporary, part-time person for them until I found full-time employment. I make my hours and come and go as I wish.

- I've gone to have my car run through the washer only to find it was broken and was then given a certificate for a free car wash at a later date;

- We made a trip to Denver to the University of Colorado hospital to meet with the transplant team. While there we stayed two nights, ate several meals, had extra gas expense with no financial strain.

- We made a trip to Cheyenne to see an eye specialist the next week with a one night stay, a couple of meals and gas expense with no financial strain.

- I've had all the brakes on my car replaced and was able to pay for all of the expenses of several hundreds of dollars in a matter of days;

- Joe has had eye surgery done on his left eye which has improved his vision considerably. He had been told earlier by another eye doctor that nothing could be done for him. He was going blind.

- Joe went to the dentist for the first time in several years and was pronounced not to have any cavities;

- We were told by the dental clinic that our portion of Joe's x-rays and cleaning would be approximately $130.00. When it came time to pay, we were told they had made a mistake and there was no charge.

- We have received miscellaneous refund checks in the mail that were totally unexpected;

- Thought I was getting a flat tire. Instead it was a unrepairable hole and I was given a new tire free of charge since my tires were still under warranty.

- Three weeks after the installation of new brake system, something broke while in town and this was repaired free of charge due to warranty.

- I've averaged at least one job interview every week as I've had two sometimes in a week.

- I've had other auto work done and was given a reduced rate on that when I came to pick up the car.

- Joe became eligible for a program that will pay for all of his transportation costs to any place he wants to go for whatever reason. So all bus tickets are now free for him. It will also pay our mileage should we need to go out of town for medical reasons.

There are so many other things that I can't recall at this moment and I'm quite certain there are so many more things that I'm not even aware of that we've been blessed by. I believe that the Lord has truly been opening up the windows of heaven onto us. Whether some of these economic changes end when I go back to work, I just know that they are helping us now during this time of unemployment.

President Hinckley also said that "The Lord will open the windows of heaven according to our need, and not according to our greed" and our needs are definitely being met at this particular time.

Today I'm Thankful For...

• getting to sleep in an extra 1 1/2 hours since I was working in the Casper office and not the field;
• thankful for a supervisor who let me work in the Casper office so I could be closer to town and be able to take Joe for his pre-op appointment today;
  
• thankful for the opportunity to work later since I will and did miss some work hours to tend to Joe's needs today and not lose any monies;
  
• thankful that the snow held off until I was warm and dry in my home;
  
• thankful that I could take "Mr. Happy", my formerly grumpy neighbor some of my homemade chicken and dumplings and he invited me into his home;
  
• thankful for my crockpot which cooked a pork loin to perfection and produced mouth-watering gravy for my lumpy mashed potatoes;
  
• thankful that Joe had a good day at dialysis today meaning no sickness or bathroom problems;
  
• thankful for the comments and love of a very dear friend who lives so far away;
  
• thankful for a warm home to come home to;
  
• thankful that my husband wants me to hold him tightly when we go to bed tonight;
  
• thankful that my heavenly father listens to my prayers and grants me the wishes of my heart; and
  
• thankful for an earthly father who listens to my concerns and understands and loves me.

Monday Blessings

• a ride to work this morning. It's always nice to sit back when I don't have to do the driving.
• being acknowledged at the morning meeting about my return back in the field since I was gone most all last week. Knowing that my co-workers missed me.
• having my work complimented.
• spending an enjoyable lunch time with my regular lunch buddies.
• having Joe's health care nurse call me after visiting him and validating that my concerns have been and are real.
• two long conversations with my best Wyoming friend/sister.
• having a friend to have girl talk with at work.
• spending some alone time at Sam's after work.
• eating a great tasting rotisserie chicken and potato salad for dinner.
• pre-moving into my new office in the field.
• talking to my dad on the phone today. (In person would have been much better).
• enjoying an absolutely beautiful day and watching the sun come up.
• grateful my weekend sickness finally left my body!
• coming home to the man I love.

It's So Quiet!!!

I'm all alone in a house. The kids house, but a house nevertheless. Yes, all by myself. How fantastic is this?! I rarely, ever, almost never have a house to myself at anytime and so this is very special. Hmmmm. I could take a mid-morning nap. I could go outside and play with the chickens. I could watch television. I could go ahead and take my shower. Oh, the possibilities are limitless. But here I sit typing a blog about being by myself instead. How did this happen? Nikki has gone to work and Corey, Derek, Joe and the furry kids have ridden off in his truck to run errands. And, I stayed here! By myself!

I like to think of taking this time as a matter of self-reflection and some good needed soul-searching instead. It gives me the opportunity to reflect on how blessed I am in so many ways.

As I am at the beginning of the eighth month of our move out West, to say that my life has changed dramatically in the previous seven months would definitely be an understatement. Let me just break it down a little:

• First there was the sudden move to Wyoming over Thanksgiving weekend and beginning my new job on the following Monday. I really had no idea what the full extent of my job would entail other than being a secretary in an oilfield. (That sounded fascinating enough). And, I certainly had no idea WHERE the oilfield was located. Oh my gosh - if I'd taken my future boss up on the offer of "just driving out sometime and seeing where the field was located", I might have changed my mind. However, I'm grateful and thankful I did get that job in many ways. I've met new people that I enjoy working with and I've met a person that I consider to be my best friend since my move here. (Thank you Trina in so many ways)! The people in my department are like extended family. Some you like better than others, but just look over their faults and imperfections and get over it. After all, I spend 11 hours a day with these people and eat a meal with them four days a week. That's 44 hours with the oilfield family per week and about 54 waking hours with Joe per week.

Spending so little time with Joe is one of the reasons I enjoy being to go off and do something different during the three days I have off every week. It gives us the time to be together and make new memories for us. It gives him the chance to get out of the house and do something different. It gives me the chance to do something different other than come home, eat and sleep for four days straight.

So, the job is: long, interesting, a learning experience, long, exciting when new opportunities come along, etc., but it pays well, it affords me great benefits and it's a sure thing for a long time - I hope!

• There has been Joe's two surgeries and recovery time since the move here which have both been difficult, but he's almost fully recovered. Recovery is taking place in two ways - mind and body and he's almost back to the position of the man I married. That is a real blessing.
• I/We am blessed with a cute, small rental home when so many others in our city have problems locating good affordable housing. So this is a real special blessing for us, especially since I secured it before we ever moved to Casper. We have been blessed with a good landlord who though he may be slow, has taken care of needs we may have had. He poured us a new sidewalk just so it would be easier for Joe. He moved a ceiling fan over our bed just because it would be nicer for me. His family even brought food and come over daily to share lunch with Joe after one of his surgeries.

I do admit there are some things that I gave away or left behind that I miss from time to time, but the move did force me to "simply" my life. In our new home there is everything in it's place so there can be a place for everything. And, housecleaning is so quick and much simpler now.

• I/we are blessed with a great church family. I love my visiting teacher who is becoming a very good friend to me and my Relief Society president who has looked after me since the beginning of our move. Joe has developed a great friendship with two retired brothers who have looked after his needs and become very good friends and lunch together frequently.
• I/We am blessed by where our cute/little home is located. It's in such a fantastic location for so many reasons - shopping, work in town, bus stops, church, etc., etc.
• I/We am blessed by good neighbors who have shown great kindness to us and don't throw wild parties or vibrate our windows with loud music and have tolerated our barking furry kids. They may have even been the unknown angel who shoveled the snow from our walkway and sidewalk on a couple of occasions.
• I/We have been blessed to move to such a state than upon first impression to us and many may seem to be desolate and unattractive. We have, however, found it to be quite fascinating, intriguing, beautiful and offers many, many opportunities to explore our rich history. We have everything from dinosaurs to cowboys and Indians to pioneers. We have everything from snow-covered majestic mountains, beautiful lakes and streams and creeks to stark, sagebrush covered deserts and so much more. It's a state where only a few miles can transport you to something so totally different than you last left. We love it here!
• I am blessed to be closer to Corey and Nikki and Derek. Though it may take a few hours to make the trip, it is so much nicer than making a very expensive trip every six months. It's a blessing to be closer in case of time of emergency or need and knowing that though most of my family is still in the South, I do have family out here.

Those were and are blessings I've received primarily in the last few months. However, other blessing I have are...

• The blessings of a good and loving family. I love my mom and dad for giving me life and the kind of life I can be proud of. They always made sure we had a good place to live and enough food and clothing. Our home was filled with love and I knew my parents loved each other because they showed that love to each other.

I really love my sisters and my brother. Though we may not talk to each other often, I know there is a good connection between them and me. My love of these family members has become even more special to me since the move and after leaving the family reunion. I realized that it might be the last time I would see some of them. I love my extended family members as well.

I am blessed thus far health wise. Yes, I could and should watch what I eat, floss more often, exercise, sleep more, but I did have a good report on my mammogram and pap smear this year and I've not been sick or had a cold, so all that is a true blessing.

• But, my biggest blessing is Joe. Though we have disagreements at time, I know this...I know that Joe loves me and I know that I love him. I'm thankful for his commitment to me. I'm thankful for his membership and faithfulness in the church. I'm thankful he is a worthy priesthood bearer. I'm thankful he loves my son and Nikki and Derek. I'm thankful he doesn't "rule" me, but rather lets me be free. I'm thankful for opportunities he's presented to me to learn patience and understanding. He is the love of my life and I know my Heavenly Father saved him for me for this time in my life. Life isn't always easy, but he makes it so much easier for me. And that is the sweetest blessing of all.

So, all in all, I'm doing well and my life is truly blessed. God is good to me. And guess what? Everyone's home.

Counting My (Our) Many Blessings

Most mornings on my way to work, I call Dad on my phone and we chat about some aspect of our lives until I arrive at the office. I recently had a conversation with Dad about how life has been so great for me in the last few weeks. For the first time, in many, many years, I feel as though I have finally reached a wonderful balance in my life. My marriage is great, my job is great, my home life is great, etc., etc., etc.

My marriage is great primarily because of Joe. We celebrated an anniversary of sorts this last weekend. It was four years ago that we met in person for the first time. Because of Joe I feel real love, a real commitment of belonging from someone. Joe lets me be me. He understands me as much as one person can understand me. He is kind, gentle, quiet, patient and logical...everything I am not. He puts up with my crazy antics and awful singing. I love his beautiful eyes, his rosy red cheeks and his sweet, gentle kisses. I love spending time with him and miss when I'm not with him. I can't imagine life without him as he's become so much of my life and grateful that he is my eternal companion.

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I've found the place I need to be working right now also. I drive to work less than 20 miles roundtrip vs. the 100 miles roundtrip I drove for the last few years. I work for people who appreciate me and my caliber of work. I am wonderfully compensated for my work. The work is interesting, challenging, fulfilling and gives me a sense of purpose. If I have to work, then this is the place I want to work.

Joe's health is doing well even with all his medical problems and since no one has been in the hospital recently, we consider ourselves blessed health wise also.

Financially we are also being blessed. It has taken us about a year to get to this point. We sunk a very large investment in a child care center which fell through for us. What seemed to be a devastating loss for us at the time has proven to be a blessing as we were not locked into a situation that we most likely would not have been able to get out of. Then I lost my child care job and was unemployed for five months with some unemployment compensation. However, that didn't help with our financial obligations a great deal especially when I was traveling around for job interviews. I have a firm testimony of paying tithing. We have had unexpected monies come our way, been able to pay off some of our financial obligations and haven't felt any loss of money by paying our tithing. Between Joe serving as 2nd counselor in the bishopric and my teaching the adult Sunday School class and being full tithe payers, I know that the balance in our lives is due to our blessings from my Heavenly Father.

I am fortunate to still have the opportunity of spending time with my parents and family. Whether it's daily phone calls to Mom and Dad or spending time at their home or taking Mom out to dinner or a movie, I'm grateful that I can still tell them in person that I love them.

I know and acknowledge the hand of my Heavenly Father in my life and thank Him for all my blessings (and hope that this continues for a long, long time).