Separated at wash, lost socks still hold a place in our drawers. Or in my case, in a pile next to my bed. Why? Because that lost sock must be somewhere and we think it will find its way back home to its "soulmate." Lost Sock Memorial Day is a day to collect your single socks, hopelessly without a match and recycle them into something more useful. Unless you like wearing mismatched socks, toss the old and make room for new pairs of socks.
This day is in memory of all those socks whose absence dooms the fate of the remaining half of a once proud pair. One of the great mysteries of life is how can one put a matched pair of socks into the washing machine, but once the clothing is retrieved from the dryer there may only be one left. Is that what is causing the lint in our dryer? Is that the remaining particles of what once used to be a sock? Surely if we can spend millions studying the sex life of various insects, we could do some serious research into finding the black hole or seam in a time warp or discovering whatever it is that swallows all those missing socks.
I also have the dilemma that there may be another culprit in the disappearance of the socks in the Weaver household. It's name is JOE! In his efforts to help fold and put away the laundry, Joe has attempted to match socks and I'm sorry to say has failed somewhat miserably at times. Consequently his sock "matching" has resulted in one sock being paired up with another and that starts a domino effect of ill-matched socks. It has finally come to the point that he is forbidden, yes forbidden, to match socks with hopes that I will at some point find matches for some of those laying in a heap next to my bed.
Today is the day to wear mismatched socks to show your support for all of the lost socks out there. The more strongly you support the cause, the more mismatched your socks should be. Think an argyle sock on the left foot and a pink tube sock on the right foot. If you are truly committed to the cause, vow to never wear another matching pair of socks until all of your missing socks have returned home. I will admit that I don't think I am brave enough to do that however.
But here are some ideas of how to extend the life of those poor socks who have waited for their mate only to find out that they are never coming back...
But here are some ideas of how to extend the life of those poor socks who have waited for their mate only to find out that they are never coming back...
1. Sock Chain
String all of your family's mismatched socks together paper chain style. Take one sock off every day as you countdown to the day their partners are found. Don't worry about not having enough to last. For each sock you remove from the chain, a new single sock will emerge from the dryer to take its place.
2. Sock Puppet Memorial Service
Turn your mismatched socks into sock puppets. Then have them gather together for a memorial service in honor of their friends who didn't survive the spin cycle and a trip to the dryer.
3. Boycott the Laundry
Spend this day boycotting the washing machine and dryer. After all, it's their greed for single socks that has widowed half the residents of your sock drawer. And it's not like you wanted to do laundry anyway. Now you have an excuse to take the day off - and make your sock drawer proud.
4. Flip Flops
It's May! Who needs socks anyway? Go get a pedicure, polish your toenails, buy some sassy sandals or sparkly flip flops and promise to look for those missing socks in September.
