11:04 a.m.

Joe died at 11:04 a.m. on May 29th, 2012. 

After giving the okay to remove him from life support, Joe peacefully stopped breathing after a very short period of time.

I remember telling him that entire morning how much I loved him.  I remember saying so many times, "please, please, please let this just be a bad dream."  "Please let him open his eyes.  Please let me hear him say something to me."  But he never did.  I was told by his nurse, Michael, to keep talking to him because it's thought that hearing is the last thing to go and I wanted Joe to know how much I loved him.  And I did so very, very much.

I don't remember who all was in the room when he died.  I do remember Connie and Roger and Sadie and the Bishop and Cordell.  I do remember the awful grief and pain I felt.  I felt as though my heart was literally breaking knowing that Joe wouldn't be coming home with me this time.  That this time was his last time he'd ever be in the hospital, that he would no longer be with me.

I do remember everyone all leaving the room.  I was alone except for Michael who arranged a pillow under Joe's arm so that the blood wouldn't pool into his fingers and he moved the bed rails so that I could be closer to him.  Then I was all alone with Joe or so I thought until a few weeks later when I discovered this picture on my telephone.

When I saw it, I began to cry because it brought back such a special memory of holding Joe's hand for the last time.  I just didn't know where it came from.  Had I taken it?  I didn't remember it.  When I called Marla the day I found it, she told me that she was the one who'd taken it.  She'd done a similar picture after her husband had died and got a lot of comfort for it.  What a special gift for me to have and remember.

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Sometime during all this confusion I did speak with Corey and they were on their way.  I also spoke with Brian and his family got ready and began their drive from Ohio.  I called Roger and Connie, who happened to be two hours away and they came.

I also had a visit from the organ and tissue donor person and immediately signed paperwork granting them the full use of whatever they could harvest from Joe that would be of possible value to someone else.  That was the easiest decision of all to make since we'd already discussed him being an organ donor.